Well that was…pretty uneventful.

We were all looking forward to a few really good matchups this weekend, primarily Penn State-Maryland and Ohio State-Nebraska. Instead of quality games, the score differential was 107-7. So, there was no enjoyment from that, unless you’re a Nittany Lion or Buckeye fan, of course.

After the fifth week of the season, there’s plenty to overreact to, so let’s get after it:

Size matters…to college football announcers

If there’s one college football broadcaster who tries to tell you size doesn’t matter, don’t listen to them. Why? It’s all they seem to talk about when Minnesota is on the field. There have been approximately 10,000 references to Minnesota’s size on the offensive line. I’ve counted. By the way, did you know Daniel Faalele is 6-foot-9, 400 pounds? In case you hadn’t heard that in the last hour.

Sports Betting in Big Ten Country

There is big news coming to the upcoming 2022-23 Big Ten football season (and NFL season). Ohio online sports betting and Maryland sports betting are on the way.

21+ and present in OH. Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER.

Someone get Scott a Frosty mug…

After a game like that, Scott Frost could probably use a cold one. Honestly, I wouldn’t be too worried about it. Ohio State is going to do that to just about everyone it plays this season. Enjoy a barley pop, lick your wounds and forget about it.

Maybe Indiana should just switch to horseshoes

You know, the sport (or activity) where being close actually counts. How many times are we going to write the same story about Indiana knocking on the door but not being able to finish? If they start a horseshoes team in Bloomington, Indiana might be a national champion every year.

The Ash beatings are only getting worse at Rutgers

This is in both reference to Chris Ash getting destroyed on social media and the lumps Rutgers has taken on the field. Seriously, what’s going to happen when the Scarlet Knights play Penn State and Ohio State? They could actually lose by 100. That’s a thing that could happen.

MSU is putting the “work” in Lewerke

Basically, Mark Dantonio is putting all of his faith in Brian Lewerke. It’s actually paying off. Kudos to Lewerke, who accounted for 378 yards of offense, three touchdowns and the game-winning drive. He’s probably going to be pretty tired when the season is over.

Purdue and Maryland should probably switch water suppliers

I know that there were only like six or seven players who left the game with injuries between Purdue and Maryland, but it felt like players were leaving the field every other play. There has to be something in the water, right? That’s the only logical explanation.

Stan(ley) the Man!

Remember the days when there was a good Nate Stanley and a bad Nate Stanley? That hasn’t happened yet. All we’ve seen is the good. He’s thrown eight touchdowns, has a nearly 65 percent completion rate and hasn’t thrown an interception. Unsurprisingly, Iowa is 4-0. NATE STANLEY FOR HEISMAN!

Asking those 40,000 Twitter experts to call plays may actually help Pat Fitzgerald

If anyone knows what Pat Fitzgerald was thinking on those two two-point conversion calls, please let me know. My email address is HashtagWhatTheHellWasThat.

How did Penn State win the B1G with Joe Moorhead as OC?

There was a time when people tried to tell us Penn State’s offense wouldn’t be able to run without Saquon Barkley, Trace McSorley and, most importantly, Joe Moorhead. Here’s a fact for you: Mississippi State ranks 70th nationally in scoring right now. Penn State is fifth. So, maybe James Franklin is OK at his job…

Ohio State of mind

If you don’t believe Ohio State is the best team in college football right now, what’s actually going through your mind? Can we dissect it and see what’s in there? Please?