Hard to believe, isn’t it? A majority of teams in the B1G just concluded their sixth game of the college football season, marking the midway point of the year.

No, I’m not crying, it’s just my allergies. I’m totally and completely fine that we’ve already played half the season. Totally.

We can all agree the season is flying by way too fast this year. If you like to point to the silver lining, though, there is some solace knowing that we’re about to ramp the importance and significance of these matchups in the second half of the season.

But before we jump into the (giant gulp) second half of the 2021 season, let’s have some completely rational things that happened in Week 6 in the B1G.

Champaign, Illinois, burial site of the forward pass

October 9, 2021. That’s the date the forward pass died in Champaign.

The Wisconsin-Illinois game featured some of the most horrendous passing numbers we’ve ever seen. By the end of the first half, the 3 quarterbacks involved — Graham Mertz, Brandon Peters and Art Sitkowski — combined to complete just 6-of-23 pass attempts for 27 yards, 0 touchdowns and an interception.

Napoleon Dynamite’s Uncle Rico would’ve had more success trying to throw the ball “over them mountains” than anything we saw in Champaign on Saturday. And not to pat myself too hard on the back, but I thought I summed up the quarterback play pretty beautifully in one tweet:

https://twitter.com/SchutteCFB/status/1446946643715268609?s=20

Chef’s kiss.

Why can’t the fox play?

What the hell is happening with animals getting into stadiums this year? First, it was the cat in Miami that nearly fell to its death a few weeks ago. Saturday, down at the Texas State Fair, a fox ran loose onto the field.

That wild fox had some pretty good moves, too.

Sure, there were no defenders in the area, but give that elusive mammal a pigskin and see if he can take it the distance next time. What’s the harm in seeing if he can an embarrass Texas’s defense, too?

“Can we pretend that airplanes…”

So, Mike Locksley might’ve had most appropriate comment of the weekend among B1G head coaches. It was equal parts hilarious, true and sad. It was really like a Tom Hanks film — it had it all.

After Maryland dropped a 66-17 “decision” to Ohio State, Locksley said it looked like his secondary unit “fell out of airplanes,” because of how wide open the Buckeyes receivers were getting.

Maybe the best takeaway from that is the fact that Locksley’s comment actually seemed to get more traction on social media than any of the Ohio State highlights from the game.

So that’s a victory, right? At least a small one.

Tuck choppin’?

I’m not exactly sure where Mel Tucker’s disdain for Rutgers comes from, but it’s definitely a thing. Maybe it’s some sort of Christmas colors rivalry? Or perhaps he’s still pissed off about how his debut game in East Lansing went in 2020.

At this point, it’s pure speculation.

There’s no doubt, though, that Tucker isn’t a huge fan of Rutgers. He’s already stolen their “Keep Choppin'” mantra and, to add insult to injury, trolled the Scarlet Knights immediately after the game in the locker room.

Basically, Tucker has done the football equivalent of walking into a ballroom and dancing with Schiano’s date. Probably while smoking a cigar, too.

Hey look, those goalposts are moving!

Alabama lost to an unranked, 3-2 (now 4-2) Texas A&M playing with a backup quarterback. The Crimson Tide are still ranked No. 5 after such a quality loss.

End of section.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Everyone knows that song. But what you probably didn’t know about that catchy little tune is that Aretha Franklin was actually singing about Iowa. Apparently a 6-0 start, wins over 3 ranked opponents (at the time of the game) and a nation-best 20 total turnovers isn’t enough.

Yes, it was enough for the voters of Coaches Poll and Associated Press Poll, with both having the Hawkeyes at No. 2. Even SEC Network host Paul Finebaum has Iowa penciled in at the No. 2 spot! There are still some skeptics, though.

Presented without comment:

Basically, Dan’s argument is that anyone other than Iowa should be ranked No. 2. Literally anyone.

College GameDay’s Chris “The Bear” Fallica is taking a different approach. It appears that he thinks only teams with the most recognizable brands should be ranked in the Top 3:

As you’ll recall, both Alabama and Ohio State have lost games of football this season. But as long as it’s not Iowa at No. 2, it’s all good.

What’s the call?

Bad calls occur throughout the course of a game. It happens. What happens much more rarely, though, is when a rule that I’ve never really heard of is tossed out during a primetime game.

It happened (at least) twice during the Michigan-Nebraska game Saturday night in Lincoln. In the first half, the Huskers were penalized for something called “disconcerting signals,” which sounds like more of a traffic violation that anything else.

Later, on punt that was muffed by Michigan’s return team, the official ruling was “joint possession,” awarding the ball to the Wolverines. I didn’t see Willie Nelson at Memorial Stadium, so I’m not really sure what that was about, either.

Fortunately, Nebraska fans are quite level-headed and are at peace with some of the questionable calls that did not go their way Saturday night.

Actually, they’re not. They’re really not…and I kinda don’t blame ’em.

Jim Harbaugh, quirk master

Ol’ Harbs has had some pretty good short jabs, recently. That’s likely the product of an undefeated record and back-to-back road wins over Wisconsin and Nebraska.

He’s either the quirkiest guy around, the king of “dad jokes,” or maybe a little bit of both? Either way, I hope these phrases, analogies and comparisons continue to roll in. I always enjoy a good brain teaser.

It’s a B1G, bad world right now

Five B1G teams are ranked in the Top 10 of the Associated Press Poll. In the USA TODAY Coaches Poll, those five teams all squeezed into the Top 9. Is there any doubt what the best conference in America is right now?

There’s a “1” in “B1G” for a reason, right?

We still have a lot of season left, but tis is starting to feel a little bit like 2016, when it seemed like Ohio State, Michigan, Penn State and Wisconsin were all in the hunt for a College Football Playoff spot for most of the year.

Maybe this is — legitimately — the year the B1G gets two teams into the field. That’s not even much of an overreaction.

Weirdest interview week ever?

Let’s close out with this, shall we…why was this past week the weirdest in terms of player or coach interviews? It probably wasn’t really that bad, but it seemed like it.

We should’ve known we were in for an interesting weekend when one prank caller phoned in with this NSFW request for LSU’s Ed Orgeron:

To be “as transparent as a baggie,” I laughed.

Here are some of the other gems from the week, which includes Harbaugh running away from a reporter, Florida’s Dan Mullen answering two questions with literally three words and Lincoln Riley’s weird request after Oklahoma’s win over Texas: