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“Man the dope’s that there’s still hope.”-B. Springsteen
“Where? Be more specific.With the wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack? Or underneath the giant Exxon sign?”- N. Matkovich
Hope died suddenly last Saturday afternoon around 3 pm CST. It battled inevitable results and unforeseen circumstances for the better part of Saturday in a less than valiant effort. It is survived by bewildered looks, inarticulate sentences and an 0-3 record for the author. No services are scheduled as of this time. In lieu of flowers, please keep all news of transactions on your fantasy football team to yourself, especially daily fantasy football. Motivational sayings are accepted, though the author feels more comfortable receiving disparaging remarks.
Note: All lines taken from mybookie.ag. Lines may have shifted from the column’s inception. They’re called “free samples,” not “free-half-of-the-spinach-quiche,” you hallway monitors.
Game: Ohio State vs. Indiana +14 o/u 61
The play: Ohio State
The skewed logic: The Buckeyes sprung the big play quite often in their two wins to start the season. Going up against an Indiana defense that yielded over 10 yards per completion in the win over Ball State, expect Josh Fields to pick up big chunks of yardage one passing play at a time. The Buckeyes look like a cleaner, more orderly operation this season, averaging only 4.5 penalties a game after the first two after 8.3 per game last year. There is no noise, there is no turmoil, there is just the best team in the Big Ten putting their skill players in enviable positions. And yeah, a better Buckeye defense.
Expect Indiana to have trouble moving the ball all day. Quarterback Mike Penix Jr., threw two interceptions against Ball State in Week One and Ohio State seemed more comfortable in attack mode this season, amounting to nine sacks in the first two games. Indiana might give one of their brethren in the East a scare this season, just don’t expect it in Week Three.
Game: Maryland vs. Temple +7 o/u 64
The play: Maryland
The skewed logic: I put too little stock in the 79 points Maryland scored against Howard and hope my intrigue in the Terps isn’t the result of too much stock in them after the win against Syracuse. Maryland’s offense is averaging both 13 yards per point and 7.5 yards per play, both are in the top 10 nationally after Week Two. There is such a level of offensive efficiency to how Maryland moves the ball down the field that seven points could very well be covered within the last minute of the game.
The Terps go into the bye after the Temple game before the conference opener against Penn State at home. Both schools of thought exist as to playing up to a bye as either good or bad for a team. Good in the respect that there’s nothing to look ahead to immediately, bad in the respect that the team is playing for the break. With an offense in attack mode like the Terps have, I’ll choose the former.
Game: Iowa vs. Iowa State +1 o/u
The play: Iowa
The skewed logic: Taking a short road favorite in a rivalry game against the home team coming off a bye goes against any sort of betting ethos I stand by, one of which becomes more convoluted with each week and loss, but I can’t ignore the 3-0 Kirk Ferentz holds over Matt Campbell and Iowa State in the head-to-head matchups. Iowa looks balanced on offense thanks to quarterback Nate Stanley, a rushing attack that saw three backs get nine carries or more last week, and a wide receiver corps that saw eight different players catch a pass. I like the equal opportunity the Hawkeyes created last week against Rutgers.
Not sure how Iowa State will generate the offensive production from David Montgomery and Hakeem Butler’s departure to the NFL. Even if it’s ugly we only need one point.
Status on the card: Good thing I kept conversation respectful and breezy with the hogs. The putrid record of last week relegated me back to the basement of the American Legion Halls where I now have to brush Bunk House Buck’s lariat with a toothbrush to keep the ixtle fibers aligned.
Please, no credit for the reference, I had to google, “What are fibers on a lariat called?”
Last Week’s Record: 0-3
Season Record: 2-4
Nick is a writer for saturdaytradition.com. Your overuse of GIFs forced him away from Twitter. He removed himself from consideration in the Vanderbilt heading coaching search.