Indiana running back Morgan Ellison is facing a suspension for an alleged sexual assault of a fellow IU student, and the Indianapolis Star recently shared documents sent by the student in the aftermath of the alleged incident.

It was reported earlier in the week that an Indiana University panel determined Ellison did assault the woman. As a result, the University reportedly handed him a two-and-a-half year suspension. Marisa Kwiatkowski with the Star indicated Ellison has appealed the suspension and is currently not charged with a crime or under investigation by police.

On Friday, the Star released documents that the IU student sent in the aftermath of the alleged incident, and it is chilling to read them:

“I am feeling so ashamed, so dirty, so broken and so invaded,” she wrote in a letter to a friend afterward. “My body was taken away from me, just like that. I wanted to die.”

She also said that she has been “irreversibly hurt” and came forward to try and prevent something similar from happening to others in the future:

“I am not here today for me, and I am not here for him,” she said. “Whatever outcome of this hearing, it will give me no satisfaction because I will continue to suffer for years, until I can comprehend what was done to me. However, I have the duty to ensure this does not happen to another woman, and that is why I am here.”